Concerned PFS Log

vicecaz

Well-Known Member
Oct 7, 2017
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#61
Congrats man, you're close!
When I did my 10d water fast I also didn't experience the easier part past three days, it was the opposite: I could barely walk on my way to the grocery shop, I was the slowest in the street lol
 
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Concerned

Well-Known Member
Mar 19, 2018
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#62
Congrats man, you're close!
When I did my 10d water fast I also didn't experience the easier part past three days, it was the opposite: I could barely walk on my way to the grocery shop, I was the slowest in the street lol
Thanks man, I'm almost there!

And yeah, the fatigue is unlike anything I've experienced before. Took a huge effort just to have a bath, get out then get back on the couch yesterday.
 
Nov 28, 2017
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#63
just saying, members here who claim to know what PFS is extremely disturbing and i see why people think PFS guys are such quacks. I am not saying I know exactly what causes it but there is NO evidence that every guy that takes propecia or takes propecia and gets sides has "imbalances" "gut infections" or "pathogens" and is the cause of PFS.

just because you have a microorganism infection does NOT mean everyone else does.

and as a disclaimer, i fully believe PFS is a real medical condition.

best of luck to you, Concerned.
 
Oct 10, 2017
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#64
It’s like reading my own story every time I read someone with a crash like yours I know I’m not crazy. The waking up, when I never used to. The urine leaking. Feeling like shit all the time.

You have the changes in body tone, like your body has become loose, and poor muscle tone?
 
Oct 10, 2017
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#65
Unfortunately I am 2 years post crash. Haven’t fixed anything. I will try mineral protocol soon.

One thing I want to share with you, I get hot flashes at night. Like a post menopausal woman. Sage essential oil takes care of these so I can not feel hot and get to sleep at night. If this becomes a problem for you now you have a patch. Didn’t cure me but my god anything that helps, improves my quality of life with this condition I’ll take it.
 
Oct 10, 2017
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#66
Also you might feel bad mentally for a while like really bad. Just realize that is the one area which will defined you improve so don’t do anything stupid. Acupuncture could help in this area or therapy. What I mean to say is that even if you physical symptoms don’t improve at the rate you would like or much at all in my case. You can get to a comfortable place mentally, with time. I’ve gotten more attention from girls than before Pfs when I felt strong and was strong. (Toned, could run for miles every day) Wish I could feel good again physically. But I’ve learned a lot from pfs (learned the hard way as they say) and given me a more chill don’t care attitude. One of the worst experiences in the world has happened in my body / brain. Once you get over that mental shock nothing can really harm you again so severely. You’re pretty apathetic or strong mentally after this (looking at the positive)
 
Likes: wuf and MNK99

MNK99

Well-Known Member
Nov 6, 2017
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underworld
#67
True @Aflac94, mental strength is the key.
 

Concerned

Well-Known Member
Mar 19, 2018
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#68
Breaking the fast update

Completed the ten day fast! (Well, broke it with about six hours to go to the exact hour but who's counting?)

I found the last few days harder the first few. When that anemic, watery chicken broth first touched my lips it might as well have been a chocolate cheesecake so delighted was I to be tasting something.

Mentally, the fast has helped a tremendous amount. Prior to the fast I didn't think I could last a couple of weeks without going to a mental hospital. I couldn't concentrate on anything and was in despair. Since the fast, I'm able to think a lot clearer, watch tv/movies, enjoy twitter etc.

The downside was that I became very physically weak and have developed some nasty problems - excruciating tendinitis in right arm when stretching, folliculitis rash all over shoulders, some neck, chest and upper back. This is due to not showering regularly according to my doctor (was too physically weak to bath/shower most days).

The re-feed: Days 1 - 4

I've stuck to the protocol suggested by mattyb. My mother's been good enough to prepare a chicken broth every day by slow cooking a free range chicken overnight with onions, celery and carrots. Been primarily eating the egg and lemon rice soup which is a revelation by the way, thought I'd dislike it but it's delicious. Today is day four and I've incorporated some of the slow cooked chicken meat into the soups. So far, well tolerated.

Three weeks on from the crash

The Good

Monday morning (second day of re-feed) was the first day I could walk around for more than five minutes. Managed to fold and rearrange my big pile of clothes, brushed teeth and shower. Family came round for Easter so had long conversations, couple of hours and it was no problem. However, an hour after they left, I must have had what I've seen numerous pfs sufferers refer to as a crash, in the sense that I became pretty exhausted and irritable and just lied on the couch for the rest of the day.

Yesterday (third day of the re-feed) was unquestionable the best day I've had since the crash began in earnest. From waking around 9 am, I didn't lie down on the couch until about 5 pm. Finally preparing my own food, numerous errands on computer, kept myself busy, doing washing up, helping my mum with tasks etc. Mind was relatively clear throughout. Felt incredibly grateful to be feeling a bit human again after weeks of despair on the couch. Appreciating small things.

The not so good

Today began as well as yesterday. Clear mind, had energy. Had to go to the doctor early so didn't eat until I got back. Had a shave, got all excited to go for a walk (!). However, after having a shower and getting dressed, oh dear, had some sort of crash and had to abandon those plans for the walk. Don't know if it was from eating or something else but suddenly had that feeling again that I'd been smacked over the back of the head and I had to lie back down on the couch. That was about 1 pm and I feel a little better now but still a bit foggy. STILL getting this weird vertigo type feeling when sat down, lying slightly back. Sometimes when stood but less frequent. Never had vertigo in my life before this.

Overall, I felt very optimistic this morning about my progress and still do feel so at the strides thus far but a bit grumpy that this crash happened today after feeling so much better (in relative terms). Why do these swings happen?

List of ongoing symptoms

Vertigo: Still there on and off, particularly when lying back on couch, playing first person perspective game, looking around too quickly.

Broken sleep: Much improved last two nights. Still woke screaming last night but not from a nightmare; I must've leaned on my right forearm (which has tendinitis currently) and woke roaring with a sharp pain there.

Tinnitus: very noticeable when sat in silence. Had this mildly before pfs but seems to be worse now.

Fatigue: Big boost from re-feeding, even if it is still probably around 500 cals a day. The fatigue seems to be related to the brain fog.

Brain fog: As previously mentioned, had fairly clear mind during fast but fogginess has returned sometimes after eating.

Erections: Woke up with quite strong wood this morning but as usual, penis feels weird and it goes down almost immediately after waking and attempting any sort of masturbation. Glans still feels like it's been numbed and a bit deflated. Managed to self stimulate to about 50% erection in the bath after five to ten minutes of constant manipulation but nothing that would be suitable for penetration. Still avoiding whatever orgasm I might be currently capable of whilst re-feeding and getting my energy back.

Libido: Quite high (haven't ejaculated in three weeks, haven't viewed porn). Hot girls in adverts are turning me on. A mere picture of a topless girl with her hands over the nips was enough to get me aroused yesterday.

Nose: Still feels squidgy.

Misc: Folliculitis, tendinitis. Body temperature issues have resolved for last few days.
 

Concerned

Well-Known Member
Mar 19, 2018
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#69
Question I'd really appreciate some guidance with @mattyb @TubZy @gbolduev @bruschi11@Goose12 or anyone else who's had experience with this.

I've developed folliculitis rash over my shoulder and back. My doctor has prescribed two weeks course of the antibiotic Doxycycline and 2% Fusidic acid cream to be applied three times a day. He states the rash probably won't go without using these.

Can either of these two drugs jeopardise my recovery? I think I remember reading antibiotics made bruschi worse but not sure. Would the cream by itself be ok if the antibiotics are not?

Any help is hugely appreciated.
 

bruschi11

Well-Known Member
Oct 3, 2017
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#70
Right now what you're doing with fasting is really trying to clean out system and put things in a natural balanced place. Antibiotics probably aren't something you'd want to be using.

Currently, I'd advise against the use of this for you. Maybe pick up some colloidal silver and run for 5-10 days. Also when you get out of the fast start with probiotic enemas, betaine HCL and these should help.

With what you're going to be doing healing yourself, your body will be strong enough to take care of the rash. But if its getting worse and very bothersome, you may have to resort to the cream.
 

Concerned

Well-Known Member
Mar 19, 2018
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#71
Right now what you're doing with fasting is really trying to clean out system and put things in a natural balanced place. Antibiotics probably aren't something you'd want to be using.

Currently, I'd advise against the use of this for you. Maybe pick up some colloidal silver and run for 5-10 days. Also when you get out of the fast start with probiotic enemas, betaine HCL and these should help.

With what you're going to be doing healing yourself, your body will be strong enough to take care of the rash. But if its getting worse and very bothersome, you may have to resort to the cream.
Thanks for the clarification brusch, I thought that might be the case.

You have the changes in body tone, like your body has become loose, and poor muscle tone?
Difficult to say at the moment. I've lost muscle but I haven't been eating for weeks so that would be expected. My nose definitely feels squidgy.

Also you might feel bad mentally for a while like really bad. Just realize that is the one area which will defined you improve so don’t do anything stupid. Acupuncture could help in this area or therapy. What I mean to say is that even if you physical symptoms don’t improve at the rate you would like or much at all in my case. You can get to a comfortable place mentally, with time. I’ve gotten more attention from girls than before Pfs when I felt strong and was strong. (Toned, could run for miles every day) Wish I could feel good again physically. But I’ve learned a lot from pfs (learned the hard way as they say) and given me a more chill don’t care attitude. One of the worst experiences in the world has happened in my body / brain. Once you get over that mental shock nothing can really harm you again so severely. You’re pretty apathetic or strong mentally after this (looking at the positive)
Horrible to hear about your battle man, I hope you can get a protocol going soon. Thanks for sharing your experience though, you're right, it's mentally shocking to go through this.
 

mattyb

Moderator
Staff member
Oct 5, 2017
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#72
I would wait 3-5 days, and if the folliculitis doesn't start clearing up on it's own, start the antibiotic regimen. Don't screw around with these infections for too long, it can cause permanent scarring in some cases, and in rare cases evolve into more serious infections. Keep showering regularly, keep the area clean. Let the area breathe, and if you can, expose it to sunlight. Blue light will kill the bacteria.

If you have access to a red light, or can order one, I would advise it for the tendinitis.

Glad the refeeding protocol is working out. Take it VERY slow in your case. Sounds like the post-feeding response is still causing issues, so you might want to stay at a low level of calorie intake for a while until you can start HCl/lysine + electrolytes before upping calories and following food cravings.
 

Concerned

Well-Known Member
Mar 19, 2018
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#73
I would wait 3-5 days, and if the folliculitis doesn't start clearing up on it's own, start the antibiotic regimen. Don't screw around with these infections for too long, it can cause permanent scarring in some cases, and in rare cases evolve into more serious infections. Keep showering regularly, keep the area clean. Let the area breathe, and if you can, expose it to sunlight. Blue light will kill the bacteria.

If you have access to a red light, or can order one, I would advise it for the tendinitis.

Glad the refeeding protocol is working out. Take it VERY slow in your case. Sounds like the post-feeding response is still causing issues, so you might want to stay at a low level of calorie intake for a while until you can start HCl/lysine + electrolytes before upping calories and following food cravings.
Thanks for the detail in this post matty, really helps me out. That's interesting with regards to the slow re-feed. I've probably eaten a bit too much chicken today (first day reintroducing meat). I think you're right, I shouldn't be rushing this and this isn't a sprint. Hard to keep the calorie discipline now my appetite has returned but I'd rather be a bit hungry and avoid the brain fog than satiated and in half a fog.
 

bruschi11

Well-Known Member
Oct 3, 2017
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Boston, MA
#74
Also you might feel bad mentally for a while like really bad. Just realize that is the one area which will defined you improve so don’t do anything stupid. Acupuncture could help in this area or therapy. What I mean to say is that even if you physical symptoms don’t improve at the rate you would like or much at all in my case. You can get to a comfortable place mentally, with time. I’ve gotten more attention from girls than before Pfs when I felt strong and was strong. (Toned, could run for miles every day) Wish I could feel good again physically. But I’ve learned a lot from pfs (learned the hard way as they say) and given me a more chill don’t care attitude. One of the worst experiences in the world has happened in my body / brain. Once you get over that mental shock nothing can really harm you again so severely. You’re pretty apathetic or strong mentally after this (looking at the positive)
Last night a guy at the gym and I almost got into it. He was benching and he told me one more set. He then legitimately went onto take 11 minutes between sets. My friend and I were literally shocked with how he was acting.

Finally I went up to him and said, "are you going to do it?" And I really didn't say it in that dickish of a tone.

He responded by saying "I'm a power lifter. Maybe if you worked out you'd understand."

We had a little more jawing, but I literally would've lost it and socked him in the face pre-pfs. My attitude now after essentially being told I'm weak was knowing I'm strong. Knowing how much stronger and how much more I've been through than this pathetic dude 10 years older than me waiting 10 mins between sets of a workout. Sure he had way bigger muscles than me, sure he could've possibly kicked my ass (not definitely, I can fight when I'm mad.)

At the end of it, I was on bench and I was like " you implied I'm weak, leave me alone." He then said " I know you're weak" in such a cocky, dickish way.

Me thinks he was wrong with that last statement.
 

MNK99

Well-Known Member
Nov 6, 2017
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underworld
#75
Sounds like a major asshole @bruschi11. I hate mofos like that.

I think they see my eyes and my scar on my neck and realize I'm not to be fucked with but there are some roided out monkeys out there with nothing to lose. Try not fighting bro. Under 18 fine, but even self defense can get us arrested in Canada. In the states, half these idiots have guns. Ruining my focus is how I justified my private gym costs in 2016. It was worth it (gains too). Otherwise I'd rather workout at 1-2 am at a 24h gym. I'm at this rec center with a bunch of high schoolers. I've been in a lot of near-altercations with randoms (not in recent years mostly).

Some psycho tweaker in Toronto at the main mall stared me down I stared back he ran up to me,, I was ready to defend myself. Some crackhead also (who actually was pretty intimidating), accosted me at same mall, a different time. He grabbed me. Etc. Etc. Lots of shady weirdos out there bro stay safe.
 
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Concerned

Well-Known Member
Mar 19, 2018
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#77
Not a good day today.

Felt like shit from waking at 8.30 until about 3 pm when I perked up a bit. Little energy during the first half of the day, largely spent on the couch despairing thinking about how bad my current situation is. Every morning I wake, the absence of feeling/power/motive in my groin area disturbs me. It extends to my whole body too, I can feel a lack of testosterone or androgens, shocking feeling.

I haven't described it this way before but here's the problem with my penis, other than it won't go hard at present: it feels as though there's no differentiation between the glans and the rest of it. Pre-pfs, when I'd pull the foreskin back, I could always feel the distinction. Has anyone else experienced it this way?

-------------------------

Thankfully, the late afternoon onwards has been better today, energy wise and mental state wise. Making sure I don't eat too much even though the hunger's there. Rice, spinach and chicken stir fried with olive oil and butter was a pleasure today.

Also had my first bowel movement in over a week (!) today. Regular coloured stools with bright carrot orange mixed in, carrot orange on the toilet paper too, weird. Apologies for the graphic details lol.
 
Oct 10, 2017
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#78
Not a good day today.

Felt like shit from waking at 8.30 until about 3 pm when I perked up a bit. Little energy during the first half of the day, largely spent on the couch despairing thinking about how bad my current situation is. Every morning I wake, the absence of feeling/power/motive in my groin area disturbs me. It extends to my whole body too, I can feel a lack of testosterone or androgens, shocking feeling.

I haven't described it this way before but here's the problem with my penis, other than it won't go hard at present: it feels as though there's no differentiation between the glans and the rest of it. Pre-pfs, when I'd pull the foreskin back, I could always feel the distinction. Has anyone else experienced it this way?

-------------------------

Thankfully, the late afternoon onwards has been better today, energy wise and mental state wise. Making sure I don't eat too much even though the hunger's there. Rice, spinach and chicken stir fried with olive oil and butter was a pleasure today.

Also had my first bowel movement in over a week (!) today. Regular coloured stools with bright carrot orange mixed in, carrot orange on the toilet paper too, weird. Apologies for the graphic details lol.
Same problem here. Glans lost the special sensation. Comparable to rest of the penis now. I think this and worse is common.

Fortunately sex is still sex, feels good. Unfortunately not quite the same, maybe never will be I don’t know
 

Concerned

Well-Known Member
Mar 19, 2018
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#79
Same problem here. Glans lost the special sensation. Comparable to rest of the penis now. I think this and worse is common.

Fortunately sex is still sex, feels good. Unfortunately not quite the same, maybe never will be I don’t know
Very strange feeling. Out of interest, how long was it until you could get erections and have sex?
 

Concerned

Well-Known Member
Mar 19, 2018
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#80
What an improvement today.

- Woke at 7.30 am after a decent night's sleep. Solid morning wood upon waking but went down when trying to rub it.
- Decent energy levels, did previous day's washing up and prepared my own food.
- Showered, brushed teeth etc
- For the first time since the crash, left the house and went out shopping myself.

Did feel quite fatigued by that so went to lie on the couch. While on the couch, got a spontaneous erection! The first one since crash, no porn or even sexual thoughts really. Started masturbating to test it and it stayed up. Glans felt a bit less sensitive but this was an erection capable of sex and my penis was roughly the same size as pre-crash too. I think it was about an 85-90% erection. Could have masturbated to climax but remembered reading on a thread here somewhere about possibly crashing from orgasm if your body's still not in good condition and considering I'm half way through a re-feed, I didn't want to risk it.

I'm feeling very, very grateful right now about this.

Other good news: vertigo symptoms didn't present much yesterday and only a little today.

New symptoms: Bit of pain in penis glans yesterday and right testicle has become very tender to the touch, I don't think I could currently do a ball check without jumping with pain. Hopefully will subside but will have it checked when I next see the doctor.